The Eagle in Human Form or How I Spent My Summer

Report on 'How I Spent My Summer':

It once puzzled me: at the initial stage of our clumsy attempts to comprehend universal forces, is it possible to imagine the Eagle in the form of a human? More precisely, no! Is it possible to personify, in human guise, that force which C.C. named the Eagle? Clearly, much of the Eagle would not fit into the human band of perception, but something would remain, wouldn't it? And you know, I tried to do it. I created an intent, and it set the top of my life spinning. Even now, shivers run down my spine...

I have an acquaintance in the dreaming world. She teaches me various things. That time, she was showing me tricks with the aura. Following her instructions, I placed my hand on a table under a lamp and focused on the iridescent shimmer of my hair (my arm is hairy :). At some point, the iridescent glow transitioned into a vision of the aura. The trick consisted of gathering its thin rays into broad domains of the same color. This created a keyboard-like appearance with blue, green, red, and yellow keys. Some of them were long, others short, and they clustered in various ways. For instance, three blue, two yellow, one red, and then five blue again. The next trick involved adjusting one's luminosity using these "keys." The procedure is very interesting but complex. I won't bore you with its description; instead, I'll tell you about the conclusion of this lesson.

At some point, despite my interest in the "keys" topic, I suddenly felt a strange detachment. It was as if I wanted to listen to my acquaintance, yet at the same time, I was already "outside the conversation." She sensed my mood and smirked.

• You feel it too?

The word "it" brought me to my feet. A hum and a thin howl appeared in my ears. I turned to the window and saw a silvery glow over her small town. It was gathering into a form.

My acquaintance screamed:

• Get away from the window. It will catch you with its gaze.

I took a step aside, but it was too late. "It" had "caught" me. My legs became leaden-cottony and refused to move (you know that dreaming sensation; it often occurs in nightmares). Visual perception began to fragment into separate images - "it", approaching the window; a shapeless silhouette with a sorcerous, overwhelming, and suppressive "presence"; a part of the curtain and the window; my hand suspended in the air. The only thing still stirring within me was my Inner Dialogue. I cursed "it" vehemently and chastised myself for getting entangled in some mess again.

And then the world shattered into tiny glass shards. Moreover, with the same ringing sound. The last thing I discerned was my mentor's laughter and her words: "You wanted to see it yourself! Well, you're such a fool!"

The world stopped. Around me was everything and nothing. We often experienced this complex of sensations in childhood, during illnesses, when delirium began. A viscous environment, we are at the center, something moves, lives, and thinks around us; it communicates with you, frightens, engulfs... A veritable prenatal paradise!

At some point, I grew bored. I realized there was some "I" that had become bored, and this triggered my Inner Dialogue. I opened my eyes, woke up, verified that I had indeed escaped from the dream, and joyfully stepped out of my hut. Up in the mountains, summer is swift and short. It passed while I was having my dream. I entered it in late spring and returned in early autumn. But now I know what the Eagle looks like when it takes human form.